You know what's cool about graffiti walls? You can paint over them. :)

And I chose to paint over that last post. Was there some good stuff in it? yes. Could it have helped someone else? ...potentially. And for that reason, it was hard to delete it. But mostly, it was for me, and it dealt with something that I want to let go of. So it's gone. The lessons I learned that were expressed in that last post are valuable and will probably come up later, but in a different context for a different situation.

but really. Who reads this thing anyway? ;)

haha I know some of you do. And I thank you for admiring my personal graffiti wall. :)

When I started writing this post, I wanted to post about this kid that I've had somewhat of an unhealthy attachment to for a couple years (no, I never stalked him! It wasn't anything like that. I just liked him forEVER and it wasn't reciprocated, which caused many tears). For the record, I now know what he thinks about me, and after learning this, I have been able to really let go of him. And I feel good. :) You want details? Come talk to me. I don't mind. But that's not what I want to focus on right now.

I want to talk about life. :)

Life is good! Really, it is! I'm not talking about my life specifically, though I'm surrounded by the freakin best people on a freakin gorgeous planet where we have AMPLE opportunities to live and love life. :) No I'm talking about life in general. Life. is. so. good. :) Even when life is hard, life can still be good! How? One answer does not fit all, but here's what I've learned while I've been living this life.

1: Count Your Blessings.
Even on the crappiest days, you can still find reasons to smile if you look for them. God does not go a single day without giving you at least ONE reminder that He loves you. For me? I just have to look out of a window. This Earth that He created for me and my family and friends is beautiful. Absolutely gorgeous. I look at my family. They are the best of the best! For real! I have so many people in my family and they are all such amazing examples to me, they lift me when I'm down, they lift me higher when I'm up, we make each other laugh, we share things we love with one another, we support each other in EVERYTHING (in an athletically, musically, and otherwise talented family of 10 kids, 4 spouses, and 4.5 grandkids, that's a LOT of stuff to be supportive of, and we still do it!), and we LIKE being around one another! I look at my friends. They are all amazing. ABSOLUTELY amazing. I can't be with my family 100% of the time, so I'm glad I have angels for friends who always make me smile and feel good about everything. I look at the gifts God has given me. Piano, guitar, ukulele, running, lighting uP any kind of dance floor, painting nails, typography, learning languages... They all enrich my life so much. I look at my car. I look at the stars. Oh do I look at the stars... :) Secretly, I think that a super awesome date would be to go stargazing... but that sounds hopeless romantic-ish and I would NEVER leak that onto a blog... ;) Look at all of the small things in life that make you happy! Find more! Be open to new things! There is always a reason to smile if you look for it. :)

I just found this video that fits nicely with this thought:

Open your eyes and be grateful for the blessings you have been given. :)

2: Understand That Hard Times Make You Stronger.
This life is our time to be refined in the refiner's fire. Hard times come. But really, if you stay close to your Savior, Jesus Christ, and you keep the commandments, YOU WILL OVERCOME EVERYTHING. Everything! Absolutely everything! And you will be grateful for these trials! Philippians 4:13 says, "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me." I know with all of my heart that this is truth. When we team up with our Savior, we make up the perfect team, and we ARE strengthened. We can do ALL things.

3: Serve Others
There are so many reasons why serving others brings us happiness that I don't even know them all! For one thing, knowing that we have truly helped someone else fills us with sustaining joy. For another, focusing on others gives more substance to our souls. Spencer W. Kimball said, "The more we serve our fellowmen in appropriate ways, the more substance there is to our souls. We become more significant individuals as we serve others. We become more substantive as we serve others—indeed, it is easier to "find" ourselves because there is so much more of us to find!" Also, as we focus on the needs of others, we spend less time dwelling on our own problems and our our own needs. Service allows us to replace selfish focus with selfless love. It is seriously like filling a hole. It's FULFILLING. It's like trying to get full on Jolly Ranchers versus getting full on REAL, GOOD food from your mother's kitchen! You feel the substantial, fulfilling joy that comes from selflessly serving others, and you get to see how sweet life can be. You feel more self worth because you feel like you are making a difference. You feel needed. You feel important. You feel more loved. You do! :) One of the best antidotes for times when I'm beating myself down is meaningful service. Sounds counter-intuitive at first, but really, we are put here together to lift each other up, so when we lose ourselves in this, the Lord's work, we find ourselves (Matt. 10:39).

4: Believe In Miracles.
President Thomas S. Monson said, "When we are on the Lord's errand, we are entitled to the Lord's help." When we are living life the way we should be, when we are working hard to do the Lord's work, when we are studying our scriptures daily, praying daily, serving others, and otherwise doing all we can to do what God would have us do, God does help us. I have seen it happen in my own life. I was in a poor financial situation when I ended up with a new car that I didn't have to pay for that gets WAY better gas mileage than what I was getting before. I have seen miracles happen in my family. I promise you, miracles. do. happen. "Inasmuch as ye keep my commandments, ye shall prosper in the land." -Book of Mormon (countless times)


You guys,
life is good.
choose to be happy. :)

And I know I've said this a hundred times already, but

life?

life is good. :)

Talked

[for real]

to my best friend today.

Love you, Jess. :)

life?

life is good. :)

I CANNOT WAIT UNTIL I DON'T HAVE TO WAKE UP EARLY ON MONDAYS ANYMORE.

So I'm addicted to The Next Food Network Star.

IT'S AWESOME.

it's on at 10:00 at night.

I WANT TO EAT ALL OF THEIR FOOD.

ALL OF IT.

ALL OF THE FOODS!

I can't... do that...

1: It's 10:00PM at the EARLIEST. My body's like, "You will NOT feed me that late. You feed me that late, and I will make you fat and cramp down on your long-distance running ability. Marathon dreams? GOODBYE."

(I ran my first half marathon yesterday! YEAH!)

2: This show has already been filmed by the time I get to watch it. THERE IS NO FOOD LEFT. They never save me ANYTHING...

3: ...How can I eat food through the TV anyway? blast.

life?

happiness is not based on that one person that never seems to really understand you.

never shows interest in trying to really understand you.

is driven away by EVERYTHING you do,

whether it's ignoring him

or trying to be his friend.

that's just a trial.

My happiness comes from building my foundation on my Savior.

 therefore,

life is good. :)

I can do hard things.

That run was for Rachel. :)

Philippians 4:13

Dear Lorin.

You have inspired me.

Thank you. :)

life?

I told you. life is hard.

but I remind you:

life is always good. :)

I lost.

We're always told that we'll win some and we'll lose some,

but I didn't think that this would be one that I actually lost.

Because I didn't think that this (the loss) was even RIGHT.
I don't think it was supposed to happen.

which means that it is my fault,

my failure,

I couldn't do it. Not even with help.

That's it,

it's over.

If you can believe it,

life is still good. it's always good.

just harder sometimes than others.

Ohhhhhhhh.... lo'u loto. One day, I will figure you out.

"When someone is a true friend,

you'd be surprised at how understanding they can be."

-Sky High

life?

life is always good. :)

Jo.Go :)

Sooooooo..... didn't get to sit next to super attractive kid in Sunday School.

cause I had to teach.

the OTHER class.

oh well.

Then he didn't go to ward stare,

so I didn't actually talk to him at all on Sunday.

BUT.

He came to FHE last night...!!!

AND I TOTALLY TALKED TO HIM!!!

for a bit.

about movies.

small.

no engagement.

;)
[seriously: just jokes]

But I don't know if he's interested...

meh.

But even if he's not,

he and his roommate are pretty awesome.

and so if I just get to be friends with them,

that's cool. :)

better than nothing, right? :)

I totally like him...

crush...

squish...

whatever.

I wish he would ask me out.

That would take a miracle.

cross ya fingers for me. :)

sure do miss this kid. :)

life? life is good. :)

They keep telling me that Sunday will come... ;)

I'm not really crazy.

But I am still a girl.

OH MY GOSH.

I haven't liked anyone for months.

MONTHS.

I liked this one kid about a year ago.

A LOT.

a lot.

He was like my best friend.

But we never dated.

I thought he liked me, and sources say he did, but he never initiated anything, and I never pushed it, and he was long gone by September.

Yeah, it hurt,

A LOT.

a lot.

Because my best friend [UNINTENTIONALLY] basically dropped me.

such as, we don't even really talk anymore.

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG story, and I'll spare you the details.

But I got over it.

Scarred, and even a bit hardened, 

[working on it]

but over it.

I don't blame him for anything. He didn't mean to hurt me.

But since then, I haven't really liked anyone else.

I found every guy just about as attractive as any other guy.

I had a couple (seriously, a couple) little squishes, but nothing that lasted very long at all.

And even then, it took a while of getting to know them to get to that point.

BUT THIS KID.

HOLY COW.

He is FREAKING attractive.

Yes, it's the one I wrote the nice note to.

And I've only ever said like 5 words to him!

AND I'M TOTALLY CRUSHING ON HIM.

...sorta. SCALE:

I want to say that I'm like at squish stage

BECAUSE I don't know him super well yet,

...but I'm basically crushing on him.

How does this HAPPEN??

Why do I like him?

I can't really give you a good reason...

He's good looking.

He has the best smile. :)

He seems like the athletic type, which I really like.

He just gave an awesome talk in church, which leads me to believe that he makes the gospel a high priority.

He seems like he's got his head on straight.

BUT I DON'T EVEN REALLY KNOW HIM.

Yeah, we've been in the same ward for a semester.

I'm a Sunday School teacher. He's in the Sunday School Presidency.

I know who he is. He knows who I am.

We're facebook friends, and he added me!

But I don't know him. I basically just know of him.

I can try to read him all I want,

but I don't want to read him,

I want to actually get to know him!

Plan: sit next to him at church on Sunday.

please be at church, pleeeeaaaassssseeeee be at church on Sunday.......

and please let there be an open seat next to him.....

It's going to be scary,

but I've done scary things before. :)

...I hope that we become friends,

and that maybe he'll even like me... :)

life? life is good. :)